Saying Good-bye

There comes that time to say good-bye...and good-bye's are never easy, certainly not the ones of recent days and months and years. I follow my all time favorite scripture that I use often, almost every day, from the book of Ecclesiastes, Chapter 3, verses 1-8, it begins, "There is a time for everything and a reason for every activity under heaven", and it continues, "a time to be born and a time to die, a time to weep and a time to laugh", "a time to be silent and a time to speak"...and in my own words, a time to say hello, and a time to say good-bye. Hello to the new babies being born all around us, hello to new friends and summer vacations, hello to new days filled with sea breezes and sunshine, at least from where I sit right now, hello to new seasons and reasons to keep living. Then there is a time to say good-bye, good-bye to all plans that were made and not fulfilled because life changed, good-bye to summer days as they ease into autumn, good-bye to dreams and hopes, shattered by realities and now need to be readjusted, good-bye to loved ones as they board planes as I will do today, good-bye to a parent, a daughter, a son, a husband, a father, an uncle, a brother, a brother-in-law, Michael.

I am not only saying good-bye to summer, I am saying good-bye to my sister as we both, surrounded by hundreds of others, have said good-bye to Michael. Each good-bye has intensified over the years, but we know if God wills it, we will meet again. And we know that about Michael, too. Some days we will desire that reunion so much it will hurt. Some days we will praise God to the highest for allowing us one more day to live on this side of heaven so that we can spend it with our loved ones and enjoy the beauty of this life. As difficult as good-byes are, and this one today is especially so, they create the opportunity of a hello. That's the beauty of life. The hellos become good-byes and it's all in the eyes of the beholder.

It doesn't lighten my heart much today, though. I can comprehend it in theory, and I truly embrace the thought, but I don't want the new reality to come forth, just yet. For me, or for my sister. But it is time and it must. Just as I have done before her, and continue to do each and every day, she must find her own way, and be in the moment where she needs to BE. That may be in a puddle of tears, it may be in the chapter of a book, it may be thumbing through Michael's bible for the scripture that will be the sweet assurance that she can get to the next minute, it may be swinging in the special swing just staring at the clouds or the pink lined sky, it may be caressing the spot where Michael once sat, or sniffing his clothing until the tears stop. She begins a new chapter of her life, and did so, three weeks ago today, as her husband's heart took it's last breath beneath the tender touch of her loving palm. Grief is work, there is no way around it. Her walk will not be the same as my walk, I know not where she will need to go on her own journey of healing. All I know is that while we say our physical good-bye today, we will still walk as one and soldier on...that is what we do. That is what we must do to honor the life and love of our precious Allison and our beloved Michael.

Our world has more than shifted. Our anchor is not standing in our physical presence, but Our Father is, God above who makes room and time for each of us as we need it. My contention is that we draw closer to Him when the trying times outweigh the happy days! When things are beautiful in our lives we can often forget to come to our knees and thank Him, but when the pain overtakes and we don't know how to breathe or maneuver, He is there. He is there, showing us that there is a time for every purpose under heaven. He has set eternity in the hearts of men and women, and for that I am most grateful. Back to eternal perspective! All this is temporary, the worries, the fear, the angst, the pain, the sorrow, the definitive sadness...it is ours to own right now, but one day, we are promised we shall say good-bye to all of that, too. Just as Allison and Michael have, we too, will find our peace. The beauty is, we have an opportunity to find it now, and we will.

"There is a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time for war and a time for peace"...Everything God does will endure forever. We thank Him for taking Michael at just the right, precise planned moment, even though saying good-bye is one of the hardest things we will ever do. Good-bye Michael, as you rest, you live on, and will be here when I return.