Sunday, March 29, 2009

Travel With The Angels

My sister has a saying, well, she has many sayings, but one that has come about most recently since I seem to travel a bit more in retirement years, and it sounds so sweet when she says it..."travel with the angels". We both know what she means when she says it, and it is almost astounding the places I have gone since Allison left this earth. Not just the physical places, but the places in my mind, my soul, my very being. Never would I have imagined the good fortune or the blessings of all the trips, the many that have actually transported me to other destinations, and the ones that keep me grounded and soulful. I reflect on the most recent trip, one to Sonoma and Napa Valley with almost life-long friends, one we just returned from last evening. It was one of those trips or vacations that you just didn't want to see end, that almost brought a sense of emotion with the thought of it ending, yet we know, all things and times do end at some point. Each and every trip taken in the last two years has been next to perfect, and this one was no exception. From the blissful beauty of the skies blended with the mountains, the never changing, yet warming glow of the sun, the solitude, comfort and pampering of the places we stayed, the compatibility of good friends, to the tastes of wine, food and chocolate blended on our palettes, this was an amazing gift of time. Not one cloud hovered, not one conflict existed, not a gliche in the itinerary...if anything could be described as "perfect", this week was it.

Again, I am in awe and wonderment at how it all unfolds and we are so blessed with opportunities such as these, and the many we have maneuvered through in the last two years. While I am fully aware that not many have the chance to heal and mend through such luxurious offerings, I must say that I can find the same bliss and contentment wherever I am. I know and believe that comes from "travelling with the angels", that now, there is an ever-present perspective that all is well and this day is for grasping and living. I would not trade in the experiences of real travel, and I do my best to embrace the travel that keeps me grounded, as well. I find beauty in the books of my home, the sun streaming in the windows, the colors on the wall, the palette of life.

So, are the vacations and trips perfect, or has my perspective changed? Do I view it all so differently that nothing can tarnish or dampen my outlook? Do I see from a different set of eyes? I think so, because the pain of loss still sits in the deep chamber of my soul, my heart breaks and cries for what was, and what will never be...I see the young adult on the threshold of life, and I see her, knowing she did not have her chance to live life to its fullest. But in the end I know that in spite of the magnificence I experienced this week, Allison's surroundings must be indescribable. She must have that little slice of heaven we lived in this week right at her fingertips. God sees to that. He has taken her to a place where she will never die, rather she will send messages of hope and life and inspire her parents and sister and family to seize the day, live it and come back to work and save for the next time. We are not to be frivolous and wasteful, rather, intentional and purposeful about our future, whether it is one day or 20 years. God is using this particular angel in powerful ways.

Yes, another incredible experience and venture, now a time to settle and nest and organize and travel through the day, continuing the learning and understanding of what it means to live without her physical presence, to be guided by her love, to carry her with us at all times so close in our heart that it is possible to feel elation and sorrow all at the same time, and it is time to travel with the angels, travel through life and the day, wherever it takes me.

2 comments:

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Unknown said...

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