This is the day...the day for taking a minute to do what we should all do each day, (but somehow get a bit sidetracked with all the aspects of life), and that is to show love in our own way. We bake, or create, send a card, make a call, share the love on this day, perhaps more than any other day of the year. In some ways, it is rather sweet that there is a day designated to do what we should do every day, take 10 minutes to write out the card, make that call just to let someone know we care, make a neighbor or friend some cupcakes, provide kind gestures. When I look back at how hectic life could become, I hope I stopped enough along the way to provide even the simple messages to those I love...which brings me to the scripture that many of us read, but few of us internalize, or comprehend, including me. I know we had this verse at our wedding, and I have read it many times since, and of course, each time I read it, I ponder over its intent...From 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. LOVE never fails."
I take it to mean that in all kinds of love, husband, wife, sister, brother, daughter, son, friend, whatever the relationship, God intends it to be a blessing and bring us peace. Those of us who are fortunate to have love in our lives, in any relationship, are truly blessed this day. The strength of love in the lives who inhabit our circles is such a gift!
My experience of loss has enabled me to appreciate the love in my life, and the experience to show love, as well. Extending myself to others has helped fill a void in a broken heart of loss. It can be a simple gesture or more complex, it can be a gift of time or a listening ear. There are no tallies, no pride, no hurt, only protection, trust, hope and perseverance, and healing, too. And I can carry the heart of my loved one in mine. The lesson is that love prevails and is the greatest gift from God. Love prevails even when our loved one has left his/her physical space next to ours. We just have to learn how to love in a different way, and we do. While my heart belongs to all of those in my life, it also beats for Allison, and that is right, and good, and gives me hope, and strength.
I came across this little poem that I will dedicate to Allison today, and to all of those who have gone before us. It brings peace and reminds us, that as in the scripture, LOVE NEVER FAILS.
"You can shed tears that your loved one is gone,
Or you can smile because they have lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that they will come back,
Or you can open your eyes and see all they have left.
Your heart can be empty because you can't see your loved one,
Or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember only that your loved one is gone,
Or you can cherish the memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind,
Be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what they would have wanted,
Smile, open your eyes, LOVE and go on."
I love you, Joe, Jennifer, Allison, Barkley....and many, many more, Kathy/Mom
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