End Of Life Stages

As I write, two beloved souls are facing end of life stages. I know too much about this journey, so it is with mixed emotion that I talk or walk with their families, visit one later this morning, mixed emotion because it is all so complex. I am no expert, but I do have the experience, first with my mother, then years later, my father, then my daughter, and then, our family dog. In all that comes with the journey, it is a final gift of life to be able to be the one who holds that hand, sings, prays, rocks, whispers, kisses, hugs, and holds that loved one as they enter the Kingdom of God. A real treasure and even though we don't think we would know how to help at such a time, when we ask God for guidance and are open to His wisdom, we receive in ways that are plentiful and good. The key is knowing how to listen, what to look for, and take ourselves out of the picture, focus on that life, that loved one, and the dying themselves will supply the answers and the need. Assisting my loved ones in relinquishing their fears and face death with serenity has become my greatest joy. As well as my greatest heartache. None more than my own daughter, but as I know to trust God, I understand that, that too, had a divine purpose under heaven.

I know it as others turn to me, maybe for a prayer, or a question, or strength, or some form of hope. And I know full well, there is always hope. We don't know the form our loved ones miracle will take shape, but when we believe, we just know it will. When we truly give our heart to Jesus and know that through Him, under God, all things will work for good, there is peace and joy in ushering the ones we hold dear to eternal rest. No, that doesn't mean that it takes away the pain, the worry, the fatigue, the disbelief, the unexplained sorrow, but it does show us just how chosen we are when we have this unbelievable and magnificent opportunity.

There are transitions and there are moments when our precious ones find themselves in end of life stages that must be dealt with, and oh how I wish we could all be prepared for what they, and we, experience. But we are not. Nothing ever prepares you for the journey we take when one cannot be treated for cancer any longer, when one lies in a coma for six weeks, when organs and functions begin to cease. This type of death is all part of life. And none of us know when, or how, it will be when it is our turn. And someday, it will be our turn. And when it is, we can only pray that we will have the love and hope that surrounds two special people this day, this week, and the weeks to come, dear Chrissy and precious Esther.

I know there are many others whose loved ones are gathering, just as we did, three short years ago, this very time, this very week, this very holiday season. A final gift, that can only be attributed to an answer to prayer, was that we held on as a family, lived life to the fullest, and had the most amazing eleven weeks, weeks of joy and living, even when bed ridden and incapacitated. Even through tears of frustration, sometimes anger, disbelief, shock..."what do you mean there is nothing else to do", "is there not something else we can try", "it wasn't supposed to happen this way", "she was going to beat this thing", words cried out with such emotion and shock. Words turning to, "Father, your will be done", "Lord, God, take her to her Heavenly home if it is her time", "Father, thank you for 21 years with this daughter and sister", "Thank you, Father, for relieving her pain".

End of life stages is different for everyone, as unique as the person and their situation. I admire the families of the ones mentioned, the dignity, the respect, the joy and the love they are providing their loved one. I am grateful I had the same opportunity, and I wouldn't change a thing, a moment, because when listening to God, there is nothing to regret. When He sends the Holy Spirit to follow there is no misguided direction. It is clear. We have one purpose under heaven. And God is good. He is always there, He never sleeps, He has no timeframe. He is waiting.